"Mama's Story"

"Mama" is what we called the woman you know as Elizabeth Bailey McDaniel or Bet Bailey. And if you really knew Mama, you know that though we lost an angel on Earth, the persecuted just got another advocate in Heaven. Right now, as you are mourning her passing, she's likely standing next to the throne of Jesus advocating for him to let more imperfect people in. Because one thing Mama never did was give up on anybody, no matter what they had done, no matter what they had said, no matter how bad they smelled, disheveled they looked, lost they had become.

Make no mistake, though, she wasn't one of those genteel-looking angels in frilly white robes you see in movies or on TV shows. She was the toughest among us, the toughest person any of us have ever known. Circumstances didn't afford her the luxury of being soft. She could be gruff. She could be demanding. She did not suffer fools, and if you wanted to convince her of something, you had better come with your bet argument because you'd be dealing with a master intellect. It did not matter if you were a teacher with a PhD, a doctor with an alphabet of credentials behind your name, state representative, governor, banker, mayor. She earned that toughness thriving in life despite a gaggle of obstacles that would have crippled most.

Jim Crow and poverty couldn't stop Mama. They forced her to leave the formal education system when she was a little girl, but they couldn't stop her from learning. Mama never stopped and earned her high school equivalence diploma at the age of 65. Along that journey, she produced children who would study at some of the most storied institutions of higher education in South Carolina and in the world, including the universities that produced the nation's first Black president and first Black woman vice president. Had circumstances been different, she would have studied at those places. She would have been one of the folks wearing fancy suit pants on Capitol Hill or Wall Street or in courtrooms sipping on tea from a crystal cup with her pinky in the air while making policies about affordable housing or fighting against judges and prosecutors trying to railroad innocent men.

But God had a different plan. He knew if he placed Mama in a small-poor town called St. Stephen, she wouldn't rest until she had made that place better, too. God knew that she would become what Jesus called all of us to become, his hands, his feet. God knew that she would spend her life sweeping through St. Stephen helping as many people as she could. Didn't matter if they were drunken, disabled or despondent. If Mama could feed them, she would. If Mama could provide them shelter, she did. If Mama could help heal their wounds – physical, emotional, spiritual – she never hesitated to. She did that even if it meant thrusting herself into harm's way like a firefighter running into a burning building to save a toddler. Because that's what angels on Earth, willing to sacrifice themselves and their comfort to save those who couldn't save themselves.

Mama also told us to tell the truth even when it's hard, and especially when it's hard. That's why she wouldn't want us to pretend that the she was perfect. She wasn't. She made mistakes. Sometimes her steadfastness became stubbornness. Sometimes she made people mad when she probably shouldn't have, including some of us. Though she overcame obstacles that would have crippled most, that doesn't mean those experiences didn't scar her and her family. Because they did. There were days she was down on her knees crying, wailing to Jesus for even more strength after fielding yet another call from a prison or hospital. During those moments – and there were too many of them – it wasn't easy to hold fast to faith. It was hard. Really hard. There's no doubt that it affected her emotionally and physically like too many people Black women before her.

But as Mama always told us, God didn't promise her, or any of us, a glory bed of ease. That's why she never gave up. That's why she told us to look for the good even in the people who hurt her. That's why she told us to never forget about the full humanity of our enemies. That's why she was able to do so much with seemingly so little, why she was able to birth a family that has seen its members thrive on the world stage and wherever else God has led them, why she was able to produce businessmen and stage actors and writers and dedicated fathers and mothers and men who preach the Word of God despite all the slings and arrows they had to dodge. She taught them, though word and deed, that no weapon formed against them can prosper even during the darkest moments.

That's why despite it all she was able to laugh – loudly and proudly – to happily beat a drum after her oldest returned after 32 years, to dedicate herself to the church, to welcome in yet another child who needed a home, to dance at a Beyonce concert, to drink a beer and shoot the breeze, to establish small business, to run for public office, to crack risqué' jokes, to always demand our best even when we weren't sure we could provide it. That's why she blazed a trail unlike anyone else.

It's true that her body finally gave out, like all our bodies eventually will. But her spirit never did. And never will. That's why we know she's up there – right now – chatting it up with Jesus and asking him to let more of his children in and won't stop until he does.

Sister McDaniel was married to Mr. Herbert Bailey, Sr. (first husband – preceded her in death) and then married Harris "Boss" McDaniel.

Her children include : Ras Imhotep Thutmosis Selassie I aka Herbert L. Bailey Jr., Sherrie (Johnnie) Thomas, Salisa McKelvey, Doug (Courtney) Bailey, Issac (Tracy) Bailey, Will (Ida) Bailey, Joshua (Carlene) Bailey, Sr., Joseph Bailey, Melody (George) Williams, Zadoc (Martese) Bailey, James McDaniel, Jordan McDaniel, Larry McKelvey, Edward (Vicki) Medley and Abraham Medley.

Her **Grandkids**: Albert / Shalonda, Jahtier / Jocelyn / Jacorbey (deceased), Dominic / Byron / Milton, Ski / Chloe / Halle / Branson, Kyle / Lyric, Jasmine / London / Phoenix / Gabrielle, Juwan / Joshua Jr. / Jakalya / Joceana, JaQuan / J'Len / Jalah, Tariq (deceased) / George, V, Nyzaiah / Isaiah / Za'laisha / Zaire, James Messiah, A'Kheri, Jazmine / Janae / King / Prince, Kiara and Michael.

Her ** Great grands**: Garcie, Jaden / Jada / Josiah, Nyla

Her **Siblings**: Mary Lee McKelvey, Francina McKelvey, Joseph McKelvey, Wilhemena McKelvey, Doretha (Harvey) Reid, Willie McKelvey, Jr., David McKelvey, Larry McKelvey, Harry McKelvey, Verleen McKelvey and Joyce McKelvey, Carolyn Pinnacle and Victoria Davis, Jean McKelvey.

And a host of Nieces, Nephews, Cousins and Friends.

Viewing (Walk-through) will be held Monday, November 1, 2021, 4:00 p.m. to 7:00 p.m.  at Gethers St. Stephen Chapel, 221 Church Road, St. Stephen, SC. Face masks are required.

A Celebration of Life Service will be held Tuesday, November 2, 2021, 12 noon, at Refuge Temple St. Stephen, 3674 North Highway 52, St. Stephen, SC. Face masks are MANDATORY, temperature checks will be required, and there will be no early entry into the church. In consideration of the COVID-19 pandemic, seating is limited , please contact the family for more information.

The service may be viewed via Zoom.  Meeting ID: 856 7025 8832   Phone Number: 646-558-8656

The service will also be live-streamed on the funeral home's Facebook page at: https://www.facebook.com/gethersfh

The Burial Service is open to the public and will be in Tri Churches Cemetery, 280 Hood Street, St. Stephen, SC after the Celebration of Life Service.

The family is grateful for your prayers and understanding during this difficult time.